Which are true? Which are lies? (Hint: There's only two lies.)
* I threw a soda can at a bird pecking another bird carcass.
* I cried while eating Taco Bell.
* I grabbed some pushy girl's shirt at the Red Hot Chili Peppers and told her to "Chill the fuck out."
* I fell asleep with a mouthful of macaroni and cheese and woke up when the bowl fell out of my hands.
* I drew a cartoon of two people having naked breakfast to submit to the New Yorker.
* I peed in a crowd at Lollapalooza.
Whew. What a weekend!
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